Nothing lame about Rafael

MattroStar Rafael Soriano has a career 2.89 ERA
and 1.09 WHIP -- there's nothing lame about that.

A recent CWFLB poll indicates that owners believe owning Rafael Soriano is more lame than going home from the bar at 11 p.m. on St. Patrick's Day. Says Soriano's owner, Matt Grisafi:

"It's not surprising the vote has gone that way -- we own him and we're the most hated team in the game. But really, it just shows that these guys are in their late-20s going on 50. When leaving a bar at 11 p.m. is less lame in your eyes than owning one of the more dominant relievers in baseball today, well, you might as well start counting the days until Social Security kicks in."

Despite being mishandled by the Seattle Mariners, the 27-year-old flamethrower has a career ERA of 2.89 with a microscopic 1.09 WHIP and 177 K in 171 IP.

"He's dominated at every level," says Grisafi. "His time will come, he just hasn't been given the opportunity. We've given up on enough dominant guys in the past few years because they weren't getting an opportunity, we're not going to do it with him. This is a guy mentioned in the same breath as Johan Santana. He's had bad luck with injuries and opportunity, but the numbers speak for themselves -- when he's pitching he's nearly untouchable. Once he's closing the same clowns that find owning him to be lame will be clamoring for him."