Mattro's 2007 Mock Draft

Yes, Daisuke, you're going to be a Blunted Stopher. My condolences.

Well, with draft day approaching and the odds of me getting an in-depth preview of each team together pretty slim, I figured it's better to do a few other less-involved stories to try and make up for it. I have an idea for a story on each team's biggest wild card, who could make or break each team's season. Today, however, it's mock draft time. My picks are in bold, Scotty also supplied me with his mock picks, they're in italics:

1. Blunted Stophers - Daisuke Matsuzaka, SP, Bos
   Sal drafting Dice-K could very well bring back the Curse of the Bambino to Boston. The kid is that much of a jinx: the NY Giants, then the NY Jets, Chad Pennington, Petr Prucha, the list goes on and on. Pretty much a no-brainer for the Stophers. They need pitching (among other things), and the 26-year-old Dice-K is nearly everyone's top "prospect." Daddy's pick: Dice-K.
   
   
2. AC's Gun Show - Tim Lincecum, SP, SF
   The guy has been compared to Bob Feller and Sandy Koufax, what's not to like? The Gun Show seem to be building for 2012, so the 22-year-old Lincecum might arrive a little early for their liking. If that's the case, look for them to deal him for A-ball prospects once he hits 25. For a team that just trading away their best two starting pitchers, Lincecum or Andrew Miller has to be on tap here. Daddy's pick: Lincecum.
   
   
3. Bashful Satanists - Andrew Miller, SP, Det
   With the team surprisingly trading away SP Chris Young, and with a pretty solid offensive team already, you'd have to think Greg Heck will go with Miller or Lincecum here, depending on who the Gun Show take. BA ranks the two 10th and 11th, respectively. After Aaron Harang, it gets pretty dicey for the Satanists. Miller's likely already better than Satanists Ricky Nolasco, Zach Miner and Tyler Clippard. Daddy's pick: Miller.
   
   
4. Norris Slum Lords - Vicente Padilla, SP, Tex
   Padilla was the 40th best SP in fantasy baseball last year. The next highest guy was Orlando Hernandez at 63. If Padilla wasn't a former Phillies flameout, would he likely be owned in this league? The only team that believed is from New York and got a nice season from him last year. On a team that desperately needs pitchers not eligible for social security, the 29-year-old Padilla would likely help them this year. Inning-eating (200 IP last year), 15-game winners don't grow on trees. Daddy's pick: Padilla.
   
   
5. T-Baggers - Evan Longoria, 3B, TB
   With Mike Lowell manning the hot corner for the Baggers, look for them to take a stud 3B prospect, whether it's the higher-ceiling guy in Longoria, or the major league-ready guy in Ryan Braun. That said, with 3B Josh Fields already on the team, and the draft deep at 3B, it wouldn't be a surprise to see the Baggers go with a closer here -- Boston's Joel Pineiro or Florida's Taylor Tankersley. The club's only pitcher with a closing gig is 38-year-old Bob Wickman, who has two guys with better stuff (Rafael Soriano and Mike Gonzalez) waiting in the wings behind him. Daddy's pick: Braun.
   
   
6. Jackrabbits - Reid Brignac, SS, TB
   Derek Jeter's not getting any younger, and while it's possible Brignac moves off of SS, it won't likely be to 3B with Longoria firmly entrenched there. They say his bat will play anywhere and the Rabbits would love if he'd move to the OF, or better yet, over to 2B. There's always the possibility of a young pitcher, and if Lincecum or Miller would somehow fall here, there's no way the Rabbits will pass. That's not likely to happen though, so look for Brignac or possibly OF Andrew McCutchen. Daddy's pick: Kershaw.
   
   
7. AC's Gun Show (from DLB) - Luke Hochevar, SP, KC
   The Gun Show have a stable of good-but-not-great pitching prospects, so getting Lincecum and the No. 1 pick of the draft here might change that. Third base is a possibility with whoever's not taken among Longoria or Braun, but with Chad Tracy and Andy Marte already on the team, you'd have to think they'd go pitching again here. Daddy's pick: Longoria.
   
   
8. Elephant Balls - Kei Igawa, SP, NYY
   The league's biggest Yankees fan won't pass up the opportunity to get a Yankees starting pitcher, and Igawa should be in line for a good amount of wins in front of that lineup. Plus there's nothing the E-Balls love more than lefties -- Andy Pettitte, Jamie Moyer, Scott Olsen, Erik Bedard... need I say more? Of course there's also the possibility the E-Balls go catcher here, just in case Kenji Johjima or Jorge Posada goes down. Daddy's pick: Igawa.
   
   
9. AC's Gun Show (from Herzogs) - Ryan Braun, 3B, Mil
   I originally had Taylor Tankersley here, the Gun Show need another closer, but with the 24-year-old expected to miss the beginning of the season due to shoulder inflammation, they'll likely go elsewhere. They have Chad Tracy and Andy Marte at 3B, but neither have been spectacular. If the T-Baggers take Braun over Longoria, I could see them taking Longoria here. Daddy's pick: Hochevar.
   
   
10. Limerick Lynchmob - Clay Buchholz, SP, Bos
    Yes, the Lynchmob are currently without a shortstop, but their best options -- Omar Vizquel, Jhonny Perlata, Khalil Greene, JJ Hardy -- can all be had later. The 'Mob have some aging pitchers and Buchholz and his plus stuff are closer to Beantown than long-term prospects like A-baller Phils top prospect Carlos Carrasco or high schooler Clayton Kershaw. Regardless of who they take, look for them to go pitching here or possibly trade their pick. Daddy's pick: Peralta.
    
    
11. Isotopes - Andrew McCutchen, OF, Pit
    The Isotopes have as much offensive depth as any team right now, but the team may use Bobby Abreu or Carlos Lee as trade bait to acquire pitching help, freeing up a spot for this Pittsburgh prospect. With Joey Porter cut by the Steelers, Pagnotta will need a new Pittsburgh hero to root for. If it's not McCutchen, the Topes will certainly go with young pitching. If Pittsburgh's first-round pick (No. 4 overall) Brad Lincoln is healthy, he could go here, but it doesn't look good so far. Daddy's pick: Jeff Suppan.
    
    
12. MattroStars - Clayton Kershaw, SP, LAD
    The MattroStars are looking for outfield help, but unless Brignac or McCutchen are available here, the MattroStars will likely go pitcher, having time to wait on a high school or A-ball pitching prospect like Kershaw or Carrasco. Outfield or first base is still a possibility unless the Stars trade Eric Chavez or Adrian Beltre for help there, but the Stars think they can address those positions in the second round if need be. Daddy's pick: McCutchen.
    
    SECOND ROUND
    
    
13. Blunted Stophers - Joel Pineiro, RP, Bos
    
14. Daddy's Little Boys (from AC) - Adam Jones, OF, Sea
    
15. Bashful Satanists - Billy Rowell, 3B, Bal
    
16. Norris Slum Lords - Ray Durham, 2B, SF
17. T-Baggers - Solomon Torres, RP, Pit
    
18. MattroStars (from Rabbits) - Luke Scott, OF, Hou
19. Daddy's Little Boys - Carlos Carrasco, SP, Phi
    
20. Elephant Balls - Jose Tabata, OF, NYY
21. Hells Kitchen Herzogs - Fernando Martinez, OF, NYM
22. Limerick Lynchmob - Jhonny Peralta, SS, Cle
    
23. Isotopes - Jarrod Saltalamacchia, C, Atl
    
24. Bashful Satanists (from Stars) - Jason Varitek, C, Bos